This isn’t about giving to get; that’s just a form of manipulation and self-centredness. When you are generous and kind, when you consider what someone else needs and you step in to give, that’s a wonderful trait. Keep doing that.
This is about noticing when its one-sided.
I’m still learning this lesson. Being of service is one of my primary values, so it’s easy and natural for me to see a need and do my best to fill it if I can. It feels good for me to be generous. My sister was always this way and I admired it and decided to emulate her example, as my way of honouring her.
But periodically I get reminded that there are takers out there who will gladly accept my gifts without a single thought for me. There is no gratitude or appreciation, never a word of thanks. That’s hard enough, but when they never have anything to give back and never even seem to notice that I might appreciate some thoughtfulness, it really gets me questioning my own generosity.
And I don’t want to question my own generosity. I like that about me. For me, the answer is not to stop being generous, it is to stop being generous to them. And to celebrate the wonderful relationships where the giving is as good as the getting.
Try this ONE thing
How about you? Do you have some takers in your life that you need to cut off? Go ahead and do it. Don’t worry, they won’t notice; they’ll just find someone else to take from.
But you, you will feel so much better as you open space for enhanced reciprocity.
Hey! Are you already successful and accomplished? Do you have many things to appreciate about your life right now? Are you always open to learning more and growing yourself?
Despite all your successes, do you sometimes doubt yourself? Do you hesitate to go after what you really want in life?
Or maybe you dismiss your past successes, putting them down to luck, and don’t really see how extraordinary you really are?
If this sounds like you, you and I should have a conversation. Drop me a line here, karen.laidlaw.theONEthing@outlook.com, and let’s talk!